So, it must be what others have known.
The simplest of things that remind you of them little.
My daughter, a beautiful woman, ecstatic over the joy of dogs…
That’s the way she was. The way she is.
Little girl, giggly lovely woman
over a dog overjoyed.
It was, I thought, the best part of the day…remembering dogs and her.
Little girl and dogs.
We hug goodbye and then I walk with him, “Colton Dixon” I call him.
There’s time left in the day, so I walk.
A slight loneliness in my step. There’s a glancing towards sky, a noticing of green trees swaying…looking to fill the space they’ve left open.
A small void….not such a pitiful or gaping hole
just a place you didn’t expect
to be so obvious.
Nothing to wait for…no one to anticipate coming in back door, down the hall.
Walking to clear the mind has become walking to fill the time.
I’m intent though and I walk on with prayers and thanks.
We turn, the set path and Colt turns his body towards the steep hill.
So, we go this way instead… to cut across the grassy field past the homes.
Topping the hill, a soft sound, a door shuts and I turn.
“Hey” he says. I smile, meeting the look of little boy with light brown hair, damp with warmth of day over his eyes.
“Hey”, I say. Then, “How are you?”
“Fine.” he says, reaching down to tie his shoes…then bounces up, looks towards me and waves his hand…”Bye.” he says.
I saw him there, my son. Little boy legs, bounding out into the afternoon…little blue Keds on white socks and happy suntan cheeks.
Texted him later, one more exam he answers. “Did well on the one today.”
“Love you, call me if you want to talk” I say.
“Okay, love you too.” he texts.
The newlywed and the rising college sophomore…
I saw them as children today.
It was sweet and timely, good.
It was just enough.
Seeing my children, dogs and smiles.