I’ve been surprised of late, pleasantly so. I’ve put my voice out there, I’ve laid bare my insecurities and I’ve told stories about God and me noticing Him or not.
I’m relatable, understandable, it seems. I’ve some things in common with other women. I feel I fit in, likeminded, like hearted.
All of us persistently if not haphazardly pursuing Jesus, a closer walk.
If you can imagine being wrapped all nice and soft in a big embrace from people you have no idea you’ll ever truly meet, this is how this enlarging of my borders that God is doing makes me feel, the reply to my morning prayer.
“Oh that you would bless me and enlarge my border…the prayer of Jabez
Feeling embraced real steady, not a quick barely connected hug, saying “take care” and then skipping on on their ways.
I’m not too acquainted with relationship as in lunching, shopping, “weekends with girls”.
I’m cautious of being known, cautious of being flattered, even more cautious of expectations and commitments of me I don’t meet and then get left behind, alone.
Cautious of what hints of luring me in to cast me aside.
Maybe because I was a sister amongst brothers or the quiet one choosing alone, book or pencils or at the hem of my grandma’s apron. High school girls found me sweet, kind, smart and quiet, smiled at me in my outfits all wrong.
College girls brought a challenge, who might. allow me in, how far might I go to belong?
Faced with choosing to try hard to make it into the good group or avoid the shame altogether, I chose the easier path as opposed to the higher, righter one, the road not taken and I’ll forever be changed by the difference it made, the course of my life it changed, hardened and brought harm,
Gave me my story, my sharing, my song.
I was blindsided by the college girl melting pot, not at all prepared for joining in or standing out.
I chose the misfits, the rowdy girls, the ones quirky and the rebellious on purpose.
It wasn’t right, it wasn’t me; but, acceptance felt better than rejection by the pretty ones, the perky, the preppy and pristine.
I couldn’t bring myself to risk not being chosen, to not be invited over, so I made myself like them, created reasons to be considered wrong enough to belong.
The eighth chapter of Luke begins by introducing us to women who were followers of Jesus. Three women whose names are listed along with others who became a part, women who followed in the community of the disciples and Jesus.
Can you imagine the time? Can you fathom being asked to join in, to come along and see?
“Soon afterward he went on through cities and villages, proclaiming and bringing the good news of the kingdom of God. And the twelve were with him, and also some women who had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities: Mary, called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out, and Joanna, the wife of Chuza, Herod’s household manager, and Susanna, and many others, who provided for them out of their means.”
Luke 8:1-3 ESV
I’ve read this opening paragraph, the first few verses in this chapter, the parable about seeds sown and about us not hiding what’s been brought to light, that there is no, not ever a need to hide the secrets we worry might be uncovered, we are to let them be our light!
And the chapter continues to describe the way Jesus healed as they went from place to place together.
Tells of how Jesus interrupted healing one rich man’s daughter to heal a woman filled with shame hiding for good reason and then healed and he called “daughter”.
Jesus told her it wasn’t so much He who made her well; but her faith.
I imagine the expressions of the others, recalling their own encounters remembering for themselves their own healing, their own “made wells”.
“And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace.””
Luke 8:48 ESV
Still, all I can think of is the women standing by, the women who accompanied Jesus , the ones who were now free and joyous observers of other women
Because, I understand this. I understand the women coming forth, the women standing near and the women coming closer to say to me, to remind themselves and to show others the way…
Go in peace, daughter you are well.
It has made you well.
Linking up with other stories of Jesus tellers at Tell His Story. Read here about being motivated towards kindness while watching the Olympic Games!