Morning is the purest time and
I’ve become cautious over its treasure, careful not to be simply habitual.
Four or five books and my Bible
A pattern, a little system to my journaled prayers.
If I’m not careful I’ll jinx it, do this then that, then this…afraid a misstep or missed morning might lessen God’s notice of me.
Slippery slope down the path of my believing my measure of worth depends on what I do, what I continue to do…
“When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.”
Psalm 94:18 NIV
Protected time. My little spot. I’m safe again.
I’m remembering yesterday morning tonight.
Yesterday morning, I was sparked by remembering that I’d written somewhere else. I scanned my emails for notice of a comment telling me I’d been noticed by others.
Anxious for accolades.
Then, stopped. Suddenly, I stopped myself. Sat still and sat quietly, clearly and in tune.
Told myself my words will go where God has for them to go. My words will be seen by those who need to see them.
That is all.
This is enough. This is me, now.
Then I skipped reading my devotionals and began my day. Mid morning, found my little book and turned to the page marked March 20.
And I was met by intentional, intuitive and gradual grace through words of another.
The words in the book titled “Joy and Strength” are a little quirky in an ancient centuries ago way. The fonts are so delicate, the pages fragile and the verses are numbered a forgotten Roman system.
The words of a French Roman Catholic mystic convinced me that impatience is the disdain of prayer, that grace has a quality so clearly, gradual.
Gradual, God’s expectations are and accepting are His allowances.
He shows us the way forward, slowly not regimented or rigid. Not ever habitual or rote.
“Be content to go on quietly.
When you discover somewhat in yourself which is earthly and imperfect, be patient while you strive to cast it out.
Your perceptions will grow, at first, God will show you very obvious stumbling blocks; be diligent in clearing these away, and do not aim at heights to which you are not equal.
Leave all to God, and while you earnestly desire that He would purify your intention, and seek to work with Him to that end, be satisfied with the gradual progress He sets before you; and remember that He often works in ways unseen by us.”
Jean Nicolas Grou
Tomorrow morning, new thoughts, prayers and wisdom will meet me here and
Content, I’ll go on quietly.