Someone requested I pray.
I answered, “I will.”
Again, the request that I pray and again, later, the same.
I suggested in a way it seemed I wished they’d stop asking me.
I told them to pray, to read the Psalms and to pray.
As if compassion had me worn and weary, as if my well was near to dry and I feared I might run out of refreshing affirmation or advice.
“Compassion is a sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress, together with the desire to alleviate it”, according to Merriam Webster.
But much like the physician healing themselves, I realized what it means, “self-compassion”, and why I need to pray.
I opened the Psalms last night and I prayed intermittently with fitful sleep.
Intentional, I prayed Psalms 143:8.
Trusting God, I would wake and begin again.
Jesus, the Savior of the world slipped away alone to pray. Like a surgeon with nimble hands or an artist without inspiration, our capacity is limited if we are not nourishing ourselves, our souls and minds.
I can’t give my best, prayers or otherwise to others if I’m not sufficiently satisfied in my own soul.
Writing, painting, talking, loving or anything really, at all.
…you want your readers’ eye-motes to go click! with recognition as they begin to understand…but, you probably won’t be able to present a character that recognizable if you do not first have self-compassion. Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird
I find it awesomely profound that both Anne Lamott and Dr. Charles Stanley are instilling in me the same guiding truth, that I must be self-compassionate.
Before I can give, I must accept.
So, I’ve been praying this morning and later, I may paint and I may write.
I have a list distractions have kept me from.
I’m home, alone intentionally and my time I’ve asked to be perfectly ordered by God.
For reading, writing, learning
Praying. Because, I need to.
For others, for me.
I’ll find time and place.
And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, – Matthew 14:23
Linking up with Mary Geisen and other storytellers here: Tell His Story