Despite the change in temperature and season, the roses my husband pruned way back are again deciding to grow.
One by one, little buds have burst into blooms. Before you know it and if the frost is late, we’ll have an abundance of magenta blocking the back door.
I’ve got an independent streak, resistant to joining in, being corralled together with people who are only a tiny bit like me, at least I believe so.
And I don’t like to join in if I think people will call me a follower or a fan girl, or for show.
I prefer to sit back, stay in my place and let Lisa be Lisa.
That’s not always what God desires. I mean, if you know me I know you’ll most likely not imagine me shouting, jumping for joy.
Shoot! I very rarely even laugh out loud. I should correct that, I guess.
I’m so quiet at home, my husband approaches me to say, “you’re really into that, let me ask you something and then I’ll go away…”
I should probably do something about this too.
Yesterday, we went to church together, to a new church on the day they were doing something new, moving to their new space.
We’re not sure where we’re gonna land. We love church, know church is something we need; but, we (I, really and his sweet agreement with me) don’t know yet where we should be.
I’m afraid this is a growing trend,
I’m praying. We are praying, we will end up in the church we should be. Sooner than later, I believe.
Yesterday, the pastor gave a teaching message, how to tell your story with gentleness and respect, explaining why you have hope in God.
Then he suggested share using the hashtag #gotestify
It was late in the day that I decided I would. I’m anti-FaceTime. I just don’t think I’m quite that fancy or special and my selfies are very few.
But, I found a photo I took of my self sitting on the Isle of Palms shore. I hadn’t planned on beach sitting, the day and day before had just about pushed the limit on stress. But, all had been good. All was good. I saw it in my face.
So, I used this little selfie for my message, my message of me before the mercy of Jesus, how I found it, and how it is changing and changed me.
Together, with others, I testified and shared:
The reason for my hope: I was raised to be afraid of all my wrong and potential of wrong and the hell that my life would surely bring. I was forced to “evangelize” with gospel tracts while walking ever perfect and straight lines…then because I knew I’d never keep it all between the lines, I ventured off without boundaries to places way too hard to tell. Then, I had my babies and we later found a little church and an elderly preacher who showed up on his own…to help me in my distress. He was answering His calling, God had already been stirring my soul and he told me about mercy and helped me pray. The road has had its moments, my walk of faith sometimes faltering. But, God has never failed, never failed me yet. So, now I know and believe it more everyday, the opposite of the harmful contradiction that I was taught as a little girl. Mercy triumphs over judgment. And it is this mercy that is the reason for my hope. #gotestify #oldselfie #idontfacetime #writebravely #healedandhopeful #rewritingmybook
Some people liked it, one appreciated my transparency.
Many it may have stirred curiosity and some might now avoid me or think I was too much of me.
I believe I should be brave; but so much more than being brave, I believe I should be grateful and I believe more than ever God is making me able, able to tell my story that will point to Him.
Lord , help me be consistent. Unsure of all the places this matters, so many, my attitude, my prayer life, my humility and my perseverance.
My hope is in His mercy, knowing more surely than ever it is forever there.